I have not clearly heard God speak to me in my spirit for about three weeks.  I’ve seen him move through me, I’ve noticed more than one occasion when I needed him to provide me the words needed for counsel or prayer and I’ve seen him fill my mouth with words (ps 81:10).  But personally I have not received revelation, vision, or really had a quiet conversation with the Lord for about three weeks.

This is driving me nuts.

What’s even worse – I know exactly why it’s happening.  I’m tired, busy, and not making rest and time with the Father a real priority.  I’m still studying my bible and digging into scripture, but just sitting and waiting and listening?  Not so much.  I keep falling asleep.

Now I’ve had some awesome dreams during those times, but the still small voice that I have grown so accustomed to hearing lately?

Quiet.

So what am I doing about it?

I’m going through every single journal I’ve ever written in since I’ve become a Christian.  I’m going back and reading and remembering things I’ve written, said, or have been said to me.  I’m looking at the pattern of divine revelation for the past three years and finding peace in it.  I’m finding that I’m not receiving and fresh revelation because I already have what I need for this next season.

And sure enough, as I’m going through these words and these past experiences I’m running into the Father again and again.  The encounter is there.  It’s not thunder and lightening and earthquakes, but it’s there.  It’s still and quiet and re-opening the doors for me to find rest and peace so I can be still again as well.

The testimony of my past has become the horns of the altar I cling to in desperation.  Which in retrospect is exactly what it should be.

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