This woman is by far braver and stronger than I. I strongly encourage everyone to take a second right now, even if you never get back to this post, and read what she has to say because she stands in a place….I can’t even describe it.
But it does remind, for me at least, that abuse is a virulent and subversive thing and is not limited.
Sexual abuse is especially deceptive and we need to remember that it is not limited to set players with set role and scenarios. Sexual abuse is abuse that is sexual but it is also an abuse of sex. An ab-use, an abnormal or abhorrent use of sex. Because we all know the story of the poor sap who was manipulated by a pretty girl to buy her pretty things, and get into fights and act all macho in exchange for a “relationship.” The difference is that it isn’t the poor sap who needs help (well his bank account might), but the pretty girl.
I knew her. She was manipulative, mean, and caustic. She systematically cut me down, made every effort to not only make me seem less like a “man” (in quotes because she held to the Latino definition of what that meant), but to also make me seem less human. Until I found about the abuse she suffered at home.
Then I found out about the abuse she suffered on the playground at the hands of 6, 7, and 8 year old boys. And it made me sick.
What in the world happened that this was ok? What happened that she thought this was normal, that men and women treated each other’s bodies like that?
Men, what are we teaching our sons?
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