Here at the Crossroads

Here at the Crossroads
The traffic light
Left or right
Right or wrong
I sing my song
At the crossroads
The intersection of my world
My life
Again
Have I seen this scene before?
No, not so much.
But it feels the same.
Same play on a different game
Different names
Different faces
Different places
But still a crossroads
A traffic light
Left or right?
Right or wrong
I sing my song at the crossroads
And the breeze
Sings with me
The trees
Dance with me
As my haunting melody winds a long and turning path
Around the crossroads.
The traffic light.
Left or right?
Right or wrong?
My song
Sings a simple question:
What awaits me beyond
The crossed roads.

And distantly
Vauguely
A voice barely heard
Whispers
A voice I know I’ve heard before
Or
At least once upon a time
A voice I know
A song I’ve sung
But the voice comes
Gently, unafraid.
Soft and still.
What matters what lay beyond?
You will find me in every step
Every stumble
Every jump of joy.
I alone await down every path.
And every path will lead to me.

when i can’t seem to hear

I have not clearly heard God speak to me in my spirit for about three weeks.  I’ve seen him move through me, I’ve noticed more than one occasion when I needed him to provide me the words needed for counsel or prayer and I’ve seen him fill my mouth with words (ps 81:10).  But personally I have not received revelation, vision, or really had a quiet conversation with the Lord for about three weeks.

This is driving me nuts.

What’s even worse – I know exactly why it’s happening.  I’m tired, busy, and not making rest and time with the Father a real priority.  I’m still studying my bible and digging into scripture, but just sitting and waiting and listening?  Not so much.  I keep falling asleep.

Now I’ve had some awesome dreams during those times, but the still small voice that I have grown so accustomed to hearing lately?

Quiet.

So what am I doing about it?

I’m going through every single journal I’ve ever written in since I’ve become a Christian.  I’m going back and reading and remembering things I’ve written, said, or have been said to me.  I’m looking at the pattern of divine revelation for the past three years and finding peace in it.  I’m finding that I’m not receiving and fresh revelation because I already have what I need for this next season.

And sure enough, as I’m going through these words and these past experiences I’m running into the Father again and again.  The encounter is there.  It’s not thunder and lightening and earthquakes, but it’s there.  It’s still and quiet and re-opening the doors for me to find rest and peace so I can be still again as well.

The testimony of my past has become the horns of the altar I cling to in desperation.  Which in retrospect is exactly what it should be.

on the wrong side of the jordan

My pastor is often fond of saying “worship on THIS side of the Jordan.”  In case you were wondering he’s talking about it’s a reference to Joshua 3.

 Now the Jordan overflows its banks throughout the harvest season. But as soon as the priests carrying the ark reached the Jordan, their feet touched the water at its edge and the water flowing downstream stood still, rising up

But imagine what it must have been like for the Israelites to look at that mighty river overflowing it’s banks with the promise land on just the other side.  This generation didn’t see the Red Sea part and they probably weren’t thinking much about signs and wonders at that moment.  It isn’t too hard to read a little bit of despair in the hearts of people who were literally “this close” to the promise of blessing only to have it cut off by an impassible river.

theme song for the summer

When I enter into a new season or at least what I perceive to be a new season, I like to pick out a theme song for it.  Whether I knew it or not, I recently came out of a time where the only song that really spoke to me were off of Pillar’s album “For the Love of the Game.”  The top two songs off that album that I kept on coming back to were “For the love of the game” and “Get back.”

Now I’m entering a time of really discovering the #JesusRevolution and loving God as extravagantly as I possibly can.  So I think this might be a little old school, but this is definitely my new theme song.

Time

Time marches on
day after day
always
the same.
Tick tock tick tock
Echoes Father’s clock
as the seconds
turn into third and fourth and fifth
helpings of this dish
called time
and marches on.

Time marches on
and the colors shift and sway
from day to day
towards and away
life and death
from green to black
and back
and forth.
the more things change
the more they stay the same.
And time marches on.