Here at the Crossroads

Here at the Crossroads
The traffic light
Left or right
Right or wrong
I sing my song
At the crossroads
The intersection of my world
My life
Again
Have I seen this scene before?
No, not so much.
But it feels the same.
Same play on a different game
Different names
Different faces
Different places
But still a crossroads
A traffic light
Left or right?
Right or wrong
I sing my song at the crossroads
And the breeze
Sings with me
The trees
Dance with me
As my haunting melody winds a long and turning path
Around the crossroads.
The traffic light.
Left or right?
Right or wrong?
My song
Sings a simple question:
What awaits me beyond
The crossed roads.

And distantly
Vauguely
A voice barely heard
Whispers
A voice I know I’ve heard before
Or
At least once upon a time
A voice I know
A song I’ve sung
But the voice comes
Gently, unafraid.
Soft and still.
What matters what lay beyond?
You will find me in every step
Every stumble
Every jump of joy.
I alone await down every path.
And every path will lead to me.

Just a pen?

My handle on twitter is Justapen, and I publish this blog under that name as well. I like to say that “I am and the instrument, the pen, and not the author.” But my wife teased me the other day saying “how much of your writing do you actually do with a pen?” Now I could say that there is very little difference between a pen and a keyboard or between my spiral bound notebook and my netbook. But it really hit me. “how much writing do I do with a pen?”

dad’s life

Just a bit of fun randomness.  I saw this the first time a couple weeks ago but for some reason it touched my heart when i revisited it recently.  Hope you all have a good weekend!

when i can’t seem to hear

I have not clearly heard God speak to me in my spirit for about three weeks.  I’ve seen him move through me, I’ve noticed more than one occasion when I needed him to provide me the words needed for counsel or prayer and I’ve seen him fill my mouth with words (ps 81:10).  But personally I have not received revelation, vision, or really had a quiet conversation with the Lord for about three weeks.

This is driving me nuts.

What’s even worse – I know exactly why it’s happening.  I’m tired, busy, and not making rest and time with the Father a real priority.  I’m still studying my bible and digging into scripture, but just sitting and waiting and listening?  Not so much.  I keep falling asleep.

Now I’ve had some awesome dreams during those times, but the still small voice that I have grown so accustomed to hearing lately?

Quiet.

So what am I doing about it?

I’m going through every single journal I’ve ever written in since I’ve become a Christian.  I’m going back and reading and remembering things I’ve written, said, or have been said to me.  I’m looking at the pattern of divine revelation for the past three years and finding peace in it.  I’m finding that I’m not receiving and fresh revelation because I already have what I need for this next season.

And sure enough, as I’m going through these words and these past experiences I’m running into the Father again and again.  The encounter is there.  It’s not thunder and lightening and earthquakes, but it’s there.  It’s still and quiet and re-opening the doors for me to find rest and peace so I can be still again as well.

The testimony of my past has become the horns of the altar I cling to in desperation.  Which in retrospect is exactly what it should be.

isaiah’s ruin

I have a special place in my heart for Isaiah. When Greg Stier, president and founder of Dare2Share ministries told me and three thousand other people about Isaiah’s radical encounter with God in chapter 6, it won me to Christ. So I come back to this narrative all the time to remind myself “I’m ruined for Christ.”

But as I was reading it today something else occurred to me. Before now, I have always read Isaiah 6 as the prophet’s FIRST encounter with the living Spirit of God but that can’t be true. In ancient Israel, a prophet did not speak, he did not get up and address the crowd saying “thus saith the LORD thy God” without being anointed and already having an encounter. You see, according to the Law, a prophet MUST be tested and every prophecy weighed. If it is found lacking then the person who claims to have heard from the Lord is in all kinds of trouble. Which means no prophet would speak out unless he or she actually heard from the Lord and had at least some kind of encounter with him.